bugs be gone

Planted most of the remaining garden plants yesterday but the bugs are so bad I thought I might loose my mind! My son helped but it was not a pleasant task!
I planted the red annuals along the drive way and in the front gardens and then went to do the tomatoes and cucumbers, pumpkins, zucs and melons in the veggie garden. I hope this summer is a good crop. The carrots, beets, radishes, beans and peas seeds are all up. I planted the lettuces ( 5 kinds) celery, cauliflower and cabbage a few weeks ago and we are now eating the greens out of the garden along with the green onions. I look for the potatoes and and melons and all that to come along! I really love fresh garden stuff.

A horrible night followed by a quieter weekend. I fear that my girl is in need of help almost everyday for a while to teach herself to learn to calm the freak out periods. Life has been so cruel to our family and I feel so old and tired. It's really not what I had looked forward to so many years ago when I looked at my husband and saw his handsome smile and glint in his eye. I always thought to myself I hope we make it through with good health to the end....he didn't though and I miss him so much!

some good some bad some ugly

So we had a really bad night. I asked my girl to clean up some dog poop because they were supposed to walk the dog out to get him not to do this on the grass near the gardens and such where we walk. Safer that we didn't walk in it that way. It ended badly, she started to throw it in a bad place that I have told her many times before not to do....then she got lippy, then I said phone's going off, then she charged me I locked the door before she could get to me, and she hit the glass door with such force that she could easily have smashed it. She ran past me so I could be stopped from getting to my computer and this isn't the first time, she takes things and pushes me around so that I cannot turn her phone off. Its been really hard and I don't enjoy my life that much these days. She is angry and mean and I am growing weary with the fight.

Then on the weekend we went to the cottage and things got a bit better. We all laughed and actually had some fun and watched movies and relaxed.

Then back to home where I feel my son and I do more than ever most of the work. She then accuses me to hitting her on the issue with the dog clean up. Of course that ended in an argument. Again I am tired of this flight.